Monday, September 28, 2009

Increase the Peace in Your Life: Avoid Drama

God intends to develop good in our relationships with friends, loved ones, spouses, ex-spouses, bosses, and family members. No matter what issues you have in any relationship in your life right now, God can make them function properly and even become enjoyable once again.

i believe alot of situations in our lives can be symptomatic of larger problems. a central issue in many of our lives is the inability to live life without large amounts of DRAMA involved. for some of us, if there is no drama and nothing wrong in our lives at any given time, we dont know how to act.

think of all the problems that are in your life right now and honestly analyze how much of it was self-inflicted, a result of what i call "drama-seeking".

you might say that there were real problems associated with the people involved in your life's issues, but the truth is that everyone has issues with the people there in relationship with.

could it be that we blow these standard relational issues out of proportion?

does it ever seem that sometimes your almost addicted to DRAMA? maybe you've went on a vacation before where you were even away from all the "bad" people (lol) and issues, yet you still had a hard time enjoying yourself, even on vacation.

drama-seeking can get so bad that some of us only find relief from drama by ingesting substances that alter our mood; drugs and alcohol seem like the only way to receive some temporary relifef. of course, these things just add more problems into our lives while giving no real relief in the process.

the devil uses this tool of "drama-seeking" in our lives to keep us where we are while not allowing us to grow in God and reap the rewards of living for Jesus.

so what do we need to do in a nutshell to eliminate drama-seeking behavior and attitudes?...........avoid disputes, avoid problems, drop them and run, look for good, believe for the best, start refraining from voicing the negativity in your life, start proclaiming the victories God's giving to you in your life!

sometimes this kind of negative, drama-filled thinking that we're used to causes us to expect drama. drama becomes something weve gotten used to. it's like a large riverbed that has been dug deep into our thought process.

here are some practical ways to re-direct this current of negative, drama-seeking behavior that we've gotten used to living with:

first, you have to MAKE A DECISION....to change, change your thought life.

second, you have to start re-training your mind to think the way God wants you to. so how does God want you to think....He tells us in Scripture.

Philip 4:8 - Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

third, its gonna take a little time to retrain your thinking, and it can happen as fast as you want it to. DAILY you must start capturing negative, doubtful, dark, and pessimistic thoughts and start replacing them with positive, Scripture-filled, God breathed thoughts.

fourth, and most importantly, before you attempt to do any of the first three steps, GIVE this drama-filled, negative lifestyle over to God and asking Him to help you change.

Jesus saved you, and truthfully He never stops saving you. He can save you from this as well.

You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. Start avoiding drama and start thinking Scripture-filled thoughts of victory. A Victorious-type of thinking will lead to a natural gravitation away from drama, leaving those who'd like to start trouble with you in the dust....you wont have time for their mess.

you can do this. God has made you able through His strength.

God is good.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

taking advantage of opportunities

recently i had an opportunity to share the Gospel with someone whom God has placed in my path.

actually it's one of my customers. i started a graphic design and print business with my brother Mark called Earle Graphics 2 months ago, and it has been going well. this business has increased the opportunities for my brother Mark and i to witness and share the Gospel with those we work with.

i thought i'd post my conversation with one of my customers who i'll name "Tim". Tim is a very nice guy, a good guy who definitely thinks he's somewhat spiritual and has thoughts about God and who God is.

however, even though he thinks of himself as somewhat spiritual, he has no answers.

in my last face to face meeting with him over a business matter, the issue of God came up, and in a light and quick fashion, i was able to share the Gospel with him.

below is my correspondence with Tim over email yesterday and today.


Tim's email to me:
____________________________________________
"Paul....Nice design. Sort of like having the subliminal eye of God overseeing the success of a vehicle to help man kind in the name of good. One family at a time. When I eventually get there, do you think it'll position me to a higher level of heaven for my deeds?

Tim"
____________________________________________


my reply to Tim's email
____________________________________________
"hi Tim,

im glad you like the design. I will make the changes you've asked for and then submit it to you again so you can see the final version.

as far as your question is concerned, I don’t think any of us will go to a higher level of heaven according to our deeds. this is somewhat of a common thought, so I don’t blame you for thinking it, because this is how the world works to a degree; do good, get rewarded - do bad, get condemned.

I would like to refer you however to a Scripture in the Bible, to tell you what It says about this issue.

in Romans chapter 3 and verse 23, the Apostle Paul states, "for we have all sinned and fall short of the glory of God."

basically Tim, this means that there is a "good" according to human standards, that we can achieve that will bring us some reward in this life. However, there is also a "good" according to God's standards that no human, past or present has ever grasped; that is except for Jesus Christ, God's Son.

this is why the Scriptures also tell us to believe and trust not in our own goodness, but in God's goodness in order to be rewarded not only in this life, but eternally as well in the life to come.

how do you access God's goodness? through faith in what Christ did on the Cross, where He paid the penalty for your and my sin.

Scripture states in John 3:16 "for God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, that whosoever would believe in Him, would not perish but have everlasting life".

simply stated, we achieve God's standard of goodness and receive all the rewards associated with that goodness (in this life and the one to come) by placing our faith and trust in Jesus, the Son of God.

if you'd like to, you too can place your faith in Christ and be assured of eternal life. just pray "Dear Heavenly Father, I ask you to forgive me of my sins. I believe that Jesus is the Son of God. I ask Him to come into my life and save me. I want you to become the leader of my life. I thank you for your unconditional love. In Jesus Name, Amen."

I prayed a prayer similar to this in 1994, and my life was never the same. my life became everything I dreamed it could be and more because of God's goodness and not my own.

if you do pray this prayer, let me or another Christian know. Jesus said it's important to do this because true faith is followed by action.

I believe God has awesome plans in your future Tim with Christ in your life.

God bless,

Paul Earle
Earle Graphics
quick • clean • affordable"
____________________________________________

my encouragement is that no matter what you do for a job, know that you are a full time minister as a follower of Christ, and that you can make an eternal difference in the lives of those around you daily.

always remember, you have the Truth and the Power of God in you.

God is good,

Paul

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

what to do with toxic people...

some people in our lives can be toxic.

you know that person that you're around, maybe a friend, a person you go to church with, or even a family member that seems to always breed the wrong emotions and the wrong actions in your life when you're around them?

many times as followers of Christ, in the name of love, we have allowed these toxic people deeply into our lives and we are worse off for it. many times we think that just being passive is being loving; that just letting it go all the time is the Christ-like thing to do. we say to ourselves "the Bible says to love our enemies and do good to those who despitefully use us and persecute us, so i'll just continue to hand the hammer to this toxic person to beat me over the head with it every time i see them in the name of love."

while it is true that the Bible says to love our enemies, even the toxic people, it also tells us just as strongly to build healthy boundaries between ourselves and others who are delivering poison into our lives. the truth is that we can still do good to our enemies and still love them in a Christ-like way while establishing healthy and necessary boundaries with them.

so where does the Bible say this you ask? many places, but im going to give you one now.

2Th 3:14 ESV - "If anyone does not obey what we say in this letter, take note of that person, and have nothing to do with him, that he may be ashamed. v. 15 Do not regard him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother."

here is the Apostle Paul speaking to the church at Thessalonica and telling them to establish boundaries in their lives with certain toxic people. he tells them to "have nothing to do with" a person that doesnt obey Scripture and also doesnt submit to the authority of the leaders of the church, yet still calls himself a brother. basically a person who talks the talk, but doesnt walk the walk. Paul said that is not a person we should have a close, open relationship with.

i can hear the questions already; what if its a mom, dad, husband, wife, sister, brother, boss? Scripture speaks specifically to each one of these cases, however Godly wisdom would note that your relationship would still have to have healthy boundaries in these cases in order to be fruitful. the precedent of what Paul said here would remain in these cases.

remember the key here though is what is says in verse 15 which is to "warn him/her as a brother/sister" not to "regard them as an enemy". the boundary that we develop with toxic people is not to hurt them, it's to grab their attention. it's to cause them to say, "wait, why are you distancing yourself from me?"

Paul's intentions were always to restore and not to hurt. however he knew that sometimes love was tough, and it established boundaries in order to express itself clearly to the other party. from the position of these healthy and safe boundaries, we can then do good to those that use us, bless them, and pray for them.

the other part of this is that Jesus is the Good Shepherd, our Senior Pastor, who wants to protect us from toxic relationships as much as possible. just as you and i long to protect our kids, how much more our Heavenly Father longs to protect us? He wants us to have fruitful, Godly, and life-giving relationships with others.

following the principles of His Word will breed life into you and your relationships. some people may choose to never change, however many people will change simply because of the boundary that you placed in your relationship with them in a Christ-like way. you will also feel more emotionally and spiritually healthy once you develop these boundaries.

remember, this is Scriptural. so do it in confidence of Gods Word.

God is good.

p.s. - other boundary building Scriptures are 2 Thessalonians 3:6 and Titus 3:10 just to name a couple more.

Monday, July 20, 2009

what a punk...

have you ever felt like you were in the zone? you know those moments when everything was going right, it seemed like everything you touched turned to gold. i believe God leads us into seasons of victorious living.

unfortunately, these seasons do not determine whether we run the race God has set before us successfully. it's how we respond to the seasons when everything is falling apart and going wrong that determines how successful in life that we are.

in my life, there was a point that the Holy Spirit identified to me a recurring problem. this problem was that i had a lack of perseverance; no determination to push through sickness, sin, and disappointment.

actually i had certain habitual vices that i would flee to in the time of adversity. i would create the excuses in my mind before i went there, and basically comfort myself and prepare myself for the flying leap onto my face that i was about to take. all the while, convincing myself with the aid of the enemy, that I somehow needed or deserved this vice because of my current circumstance or state of mind due to the aforementioned problems.

i used to believe that I was a Warrior for Christ. what a joke. My life had become the epitome of the Scripture in Proverbs that states, "if you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small" (prov. 24:10).

typically I would get sick, get discouraged and/or disappointed because of certain circumstances and then use them as an excuse to give a vacation to my carnality. I was weak. Unexcercised in my faith, not persevering through trouble.

it's in these moments that i typically remember paul and silas who were beaten for preaching the Gospel and thrown into jail. yet they tapped into God's strength due to the lack of their own and turned from their carnality to the Living God; singing praises to God from a cold, damp and bloody jail cell.

it's in these moments i've felt like a punk.

have you felt like i have before.....a weakling who follows Christ soft, not hard.......when it's convenient or worth our while.......when we are in the seasons of victory and it's all smiles and Scriptures and joel osteen sermons and Bibles and laptops and starbucks? it's easy to follow Christ during these times.

what about after the beatings?.....the failures?.....the sicknesses?.......the disappointments?.....even through the times of God's discipline?

interesting that the word discipline is where we derive the word "disciple". if I call myself a disciple of Christ, that means that i am following the disciplines that Christ demonstrated in His life.

Jesus persevered, always trusting in His Father to take care of and provide for Him. He always demonstrated a quiet confidence knowing that His Father would take care of the current situations facing Him. He told us continually to "have faith in God" and to "not let our hearts be troubled".

does that mean we should always "game-face" our circumstances? no. Jesus wept profusely facing His ultimate trial, somehow even crying what was like tears of blood.

Jesus PERSEVERED although. He grabbed His Fathers hand and went forward towards His destiny.

let's learn this discipline from Jesus; the discipline of perseverance.

I won't be a punk.

God help me follow hard.....by Your Strength, Your ability in me.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

the Power of Perseverance

i love this Scripture....

"He who has BEGUN a good work in you WILL CONTINUE IT until the DAY OF CHRIST." Phil. 1:6

we all come to moments in life where we face a mountain thats higher than any we've faced before; a trial, tribulation, or hardship that's like none other. these are the defining moments in life that reveal who and what we are truly living for.

after all, it's not what happens on the first day of marriage that matters, but where you are on the last. as wonderful as it is, it's not the first day of our childrens lives that matters most, but it's where they are on their last day on this earth that reveals who they are and who they are living for.

the Apostle Paul in writing this letter to the church at Philippi reminded us of this. he said it's not how you begin that's the most important, it's trusting in God to continue his work in us UNTIL THE DAY OF CHRIST; where we are on the last day is most important.

i recently have had two good friends go through difficult times simultaneously. both were married and had been married for years. one had recently had his wife leave after confronting her about an online affair she was having. the other found out her husband had had a girlfriend for over a year.

ive been able to watch how these two are handling their current hardships, and ive found that they are handling these hardships very differently.

my one friend has given in to sin. he's drinking, given in to sexual immorality, and has surrounded himself with people that partner with him in these works of darkness. he has started to implode and has stopped persevering through his trials. my friend is choosing not to allow Christ "to continue the good work" that He started in his life.

my other friend is handling her hardship 180 degrees differently. i recently connected with her on Facebook and heres what she wrote me:

"My Husband has a girlfriend and has had one for a long time. I believed we could get past it, we went to marriage counseling.... we did individual therapy.... There comes a point when enough is enough. I believe deep down he is a great guy who has made and continues to make awful choices. I (recently) filed for divorce. We will never work unless he believes in God. He said he wants to believe in God but just can't.

I KNOW that God has fantastic things in store for me and my little ones. There have been lots of little bumps in the road, but I totally see the light at the end of the tunnel and I appreciate all the new doors that are opening up for my family.

I have been doing a lot of house cleaning... I am only keeping the positive, God-loving people in my life. I try to read the Bible and Joel OSteen and journal daily to keep me focused and on the right path. It is incredibly easy to go down the other road. I've been there, done that, its not for me!"

notice the difference.....one is allowing Christ to continue the work that He started in them, while one is not. one is allowing their current hardship to define their lives, while one has turned their hardship into their "defining moment". she is allowing Christ to cause her to "persevere".

Perseverance is the gift of God to get us from the "first day" to our "last day". it's our partnering and surrendering to God in the middle of our most difficult day to allow God to finish what He's started.

the enemy loves to tell us that our best days are behind us. let me tell you that God says your best days are still ahead.

turn those hardships into defining moments. by partnering with Christ and allowing Him to continue working in us in the midst of our hardships, we become people who persevere by God's strength and grace.

may the power of Christ be with you all. Christ is the power to persevere.

Monday, July 6, 2009

got irritation?

do you ever find yourself irritated and easily angered?

truth is that we all do for various reasons: kids, wife, job, family, friends, bills, drivers, weather, money, wrong sandwich in the drive-thru. life is full of irritations and things that can light our fire.

God's Word says in 1 Corinthians 13 that God's love enables us to be slow to anger and to become less irritable.

"love is not.....irritable (easily angered in the NIV)" 1 cor. 13:5

when i think about it, im typically irritated by the things that get in the way of what i want to do. if im driving, i want everyone to get out of my way. if im at home, i want the kids to be quiet so i can watch tv. to be honest, irritability and anger emerge from our selfishness, our own ambitions.

there's a powerful prayer that Paul the Apostle prays in Ephesians 3. he prays that God would help him become "rooted and grounded in love" (vs. 17). he then asks to know God's love so that he could understand how much God loves not only him, but all the saints, all of his brothers and sisters in Christ. (vs. 18)

isnt it time to release our selfishness to God, and gain a broad view of God's love; not to just know how much He loves and cares for us, but how much He loves and cares for those around us; for others.

Corinthians says this type of love will stop irritability and anger in its tracks.

we must be aware of the fact that our ambitions, agendas, and needs arent the only ones that matter. God's love will make us mindful of the needs and agendas of the people around us as well.

i encourage you to pray for what paul did in Ephesians 3; that God's love would grow in us. knowing His love leads to the fullness of God. (vs. 19)

how He loves....

Thursday, July 2, 2009

be yourself...

i realized that over the last while i had been trying to be someone that im not.

for those of you that know me, you know that im a straight shooter. i dont like a lot of fluff, and when it comes to the people God has entrusted me with to Pastor, i dont have a lot of patience for the things that come in between them and God. im not really a beat around the bush kind of guy.

of course this has gotten me into a number of peoples dog houses before, but i honestly from the bottom of my heart long to see the people i pastor serve Christ with all they have. i hate the things that separate us from God and His best.

my personality has been criticized by some over the years because of the aforementioned.

my error has been that ive allowed the desire for the approval of others to cause me not to enjoy myself and who God's wired me to be.

God has made me that guy that's the straight shooter, that's bold. not to say that i've done everything right, that's for sure. however, i am who God made me to be. He's always refining us into a better, more Christ-like version of ourselves, but we need to recognize who God made us to be.

i had been a little frustrated lately, and now i know why. i have been trying to be who others have wanted me to be. i havent been the guy that God created me to be.

no more. i may not be the best pastor in the world, the best dad in the world, the best husband in the world, but i am the best that I CAN BE.

i am going to be myself, and i encourage you to do the same.

how He loves....

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

extraordinary encounters with God

remember back to the last time you had an extraordinary encounter with God.

think about your feelings in the midst of that encounter. were you burdened with the weight of your shortcomings? did you feel as though you werent worthy to be in His Presence? maybe you were so concerned with receiving an answer to prayer that you didn't enjoy God's Presence as you could've.

whenever i've experienced the Presence of God during worship or prayer in an extraordinary encounter, i've known all of these things; feelings of inadequacy, a broad view of my weaknesses, and an inability to transfer focus from my needs to God.

however, as ive went deeper into His Presence, these things begin to shed away. one by one, they begin to be thrown off by the power of His Presence.

i realize that im His son, and that my sins are washed away. i begin to feel His heart of love for me.

i realize that He is my strength, and it's by Him that i will overcome our my own weaknesses. i begin to feel His heart of love for me.

i realize that He is the loving and strong Shepherd who is able to take care of everyone one of my needs without my assistance. i begin to feel His heart of love for me.

see, as we draw near, we begin to "bend beneath the weight of His wind and glory."* the concerns and fears we have are swallowed up by the gulf that is His grace. i realize that i had been worried about things that were in the Hand of the Father when i am in His Presence.

then i'm hushed.

i find that at certain points when im in Gods Presence that i can think, do, or say almost nothing.

it's at this point that i realize that i'm encountering the love of God. nothing else matters in this moment. there are no other feelings to feel, no other words to say.

i stand weightlessly on my own two feet, as the wind of His Presence and grace overcome me like a hurricane.

how He loves us.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

how He loves us...

my hearts been a pool this week.

it started at desperation conference 09 in colorado springs. when you're in true fellowship with God for 3 days straight pretty much nonstop you connect to Gods heart.

for me the climax of the conference was when kari jobe and the desperation band on friday sang a song i hadnt heard before titled "how he loves". it was a song written by john mark mcmillan.

its a song filled with passionate lyrics about how the Fathers love for us is like a hurricane, in which we are a tree. under the power of His wind and mercy we are pummeled with the beatings and longings of His heart for us.

when i encounter God in a deeper sense, gone are the thoughts of insufficiency, of inadequacy, of self-loathing. His heart violently pounding in my ear wont allow me to be centered on anything other than His love for me.

i came to the conclusion that many times when i enter into seasons of feeling hopelessly insufficient as a follower of Christ it's simply because i havent been connected to the Presence of God. many times the general noise of life tries to drown out the wonderful noise of the beating heart of the Father, so madly in love with us.

in lieu of the Presence of God many times we fill our lives with religious practices that on the surface seem to be a good idea, but they always miss the point. the point is connecting in loving fellowship with our Father; this is why we exist. each one of us.

maybe its fasting for you, or Scripture reading, or "hail mary's", or giving to the homeless, or praying, or any other religious practice that alleviates the conscience from feeling a sense of heaviness or weight.

ive dealt with that heaviness since i began following Christ. i now know what it is.....

....it's the lack of hearing the beating heart of the Father. it's a lack of connecting to God in loving fellowship, experienced as a desire of our heart and not as a duty.

ive decided to never seek God out of a sense of duty. if i feel pressure on me, whether it is self-imposed or thrown at me from darkness, i will not submit to that impulse. however, i am drawn to God by His Grace, never "duty".

after all, i dont want my wife, friends, or kids to spend time with me because they have to. when they know how good i am to them, how my heart beats for them, they want to spend time with Dad. the same is so of our Father.

if its out of duty that you fast, pray, read, or go to church eventually you will fail out of frustration.

however, when you experience the love of God, the love that's like a hurricane, that "bends you beneath the weight of His wind and mercy", you long to be with Him. nothing else in life will do.

how He loves us....